Chivalry: Dead...?

In one of the workshops I conducted, as I was discussing the concept of "Humanity" (or being humane), a very forthright participant--a lady--commented, "The problem right now is that chivalry is long dead."

This somehow struck some of the participants--both men and women--and got them thinking that, yes, perhaps chivalry (defined by www.dictionary.com as "n 1: courtesy towards women [syn: gallantry, politesse]") is, indeed, already dead. A number of people nodding their heads showed that they were in agreement.

I, however, contested. And I gave them my two cents worth...by giving an authentic case in point. I said that in my whole 20some years of giving my seat up--be it on the bus, LRT, MRT, or any other instance where I could possibly give my seat to a seemingly more "needy" individual--to, say 300 to 500 people (I am not just singling out women here, but I am including elderly people), only about 50 MAX have uttered "Thank you".

In retrospect, I realized that some people--in most cases, ladies--have this strange hypothesis (perhaps told them from generation to generation) that they deserve to be offered a seat by men. And, don't get me wrong. I am no chauvinist male. I do believe that ladies are entitled to this kind gesture. But I am sure that you will agree with me when I say that with this kind gesture, a corresponding kindness is likewise expected: simple gratitude. Two 1-syllable words: THANK and YOU. How hard is that to say?

(And, again, do not get me wrong. It's not like us men [or I in particular] do it as a form of anti-feminist act: that is to insinuate that we are the stronger lot and so women should be given the seats to, and not vice-versa. Likewise, it's not like we [or I in particular] do this good deed just to get a "thank you" as "payment". It's nothing like that.)

Look around. Humanity (or simple kindness in general) is slowly evanescing.

1. You enter a mall or your building at work (or perhaps shop at a botique) and what do you do when the security guard greets you good morning? Nothing. You do not even acknowledge his existence. How hard is it to temper on the condescension every once in a while and greet back?
2. You fall in line (or are caught in traffic), and someone seems to take a (long) while to move on, and thus is holding you up. What's two extra minutes of waiting? Do you have loose bowel movement, and you're in dire need to release your shit that you're in such a hurry?
3. Someone approaches you in the street and announces that he/she badly needs to go home to his province, and he/she needs at least twenty pesos from you. Scammers notwithstanding, why do you find it hard to believe his/her situation, and help him/her out? What has so badly fucked up your trust that you cannot seem to bank on other people's words anymore? Personally, I have been "victimized" by scammers, too. And it's really, really sad how because of these people, we cannot seem to trust them anymore...
4. Sarcasm. Is this the only service you offer?

This list could go on. I'm sure you have more to add to this. But bottom line is: what happened to you/us? Has the world been so bad, and has your life fucked you up big time that you seem to shun from good intentions?

What's that Eraserheads song...? Aah. "With a Smile". It has a line that struck me as, sadly, true. "In a world where everybody hates a happy ending story..." Tell me. When was the last time you watched a movie and said, "Eww. That was such overkill. I think the guy should have died. Or the girl should've left him." I rest my case.

The world needs more Mother Theresas. And they need not all be confined in monasteries.

A whole lot of people of today are skeptical or pessimistic, saying that the world has gone sour and that there is absolutely nothing we can do about it anymore...that nothing will make a difference. To that, I say: it need not be us who would enjoy this "kind world" that we dream of. It may not happen in our lifetimes, but at least, we should start somewhere. Back in my university, there was an adage saying "Kung hindi ngayon, kailan pa?" ("If not now, when?") Strong words. It's never too late, but it's now or never.

You still say chivalry is dead? I say not. I say gratitude and kindness died first. Let's bring it back from the dead.